Erection problems can be very disabling for many men. Indeed, the inability to have an erection strong enough to penetrate your partner, or a problem with a soft erection during the act can be very humiliating. And lead to a vicious circle by associating sexual intercourse with a source of anxiety. Which can be as bad for your self-confidence as your sex life.
In fact, this erectile problem affects many more men than you might think. It is often associated with aging. This is not false since almost a quarter of men over 65 encounter this type of difficulty. But 5% of men under 40 can also have difficulty getting an erection. Or in any case not managing to maintain their erection long enough during the act to satisfy their partner.
However, an erection problem during intercourse is not inevitable. You can have a fulfilling and satisfying sex life at any age, even as you get older.
This begins with understanding the nature of your problem. To find the best solution for your situation. We present them all to you in this complete article.
1 What are the causes of an erection problem during sex?
2 Solutions to erection problems during sex
3 The consequences of an erection problem
What are the causes of an erection problem during sex?
Having an erection problem during intercourse is not related to male impotence. Indeed, in most cases, you manage to have an erection in the morning as soon as you wake up. Or even when you watch an X movie or masturbate. This proves that your arteries and nerves (the parts of your body that allow your penis to erect) are working perfectly. Everything is functional on this side. So the problem comes from elsewhere.
Stress: the first cause of an erection problem during penetration
If your body is functioning well, and you manage to have an erection "on your own", another cause explains why you cannot maintain an erection during penetration. If your body is not to blame, it is because the origin is certainly psychological.
And indeed, stress is often the obvious cause of an erection problem during sex. If you're anxious about not satisfying your partner, or not holding out long enough to give them an orgasm, your body is going to send you a rush of adrenaline.
A study of veterans with post-traumatic stress found that this type of stress increased the risk of sexual dysfunctions by more than three times.
Long-term stress and anxiety can increase certain hormone levels in your body and interfere with your body's processes. It can also lead to other health issues that can cause erectile difficulties.
Off, this hormone is a bit like the kryptonite of your erection. And when your body secretes it, you risk not being able to have an erection automatically.
Concretely, this discharge is explained, because you are anxious about your performance. And that you are afraid of not being able to penetrate it. Hence the origin of your breakdown, which is mental and not physical (source).
The vicious circle problem
The problem with this mental cause of your erection problem during intercourse is that it can lead to a vicious circle. If you have had a temporary breakdown (which can be explained very simply by a sudden fatigue, an evening too drunk or insufficient sexual stimulation), this can set a precedent harmful to your self-confidence.
To the stress is therefore added the pressure that this happens again. This will increase the risk that a new breakdown will once again prevent you from satisfying your partner. And so on.
You can also worry that she will ask questions, that she will see that you have a perfect hard-on when you wake up, or that she may no longer feel wanted by you. The fear that you will cheat on her can also add to your performance pressure. The result: repeated breakdowns that will only make the problem worse.
The role of the prostate
Your prostate may also be the cause of your erection problem during intercourse. In the case of a breakdown during penetration, atherosclerosis would be the cause. This degeneration of your arteries can indeed lead to circulation problems.
These will slow down your blood flow, and therefore prevent you from maintaining your erection during the act. If you had your prostate removed, it may have affected nerves. What will prevent you from having an erection easily and for a long time (source)
Other causes that may explain your erectile dysfunction are:
– too low a testosterone level ; 15- hypertension : high blood pressure can contribute to erectile dysfunction. Some of the drugs used to treat high blood pressure can also cause erectile difficulties. According to the authors of a study, about 30% of men with hypertension also had erectile difficulties (source). – diabetes : to have an erection, men need healthy blood vessels, nerves and male hormones. They must also have desire and be sexually stimulated. Diabetes can damage the blood vessels and nerves that control erection. Consequences: Even if you have normal amounts of male hormones and feel like having sex, you may not be able to get a firm erection. On the other hand, if you have diabetes but adopt a healthier lifestyle, you can reduce your diabetes symptoms and improve your sexual health, as this 2014 study explains (source). – multiple sclerosis (source); – vascular problems ; – taking treatments for depression such as antidepressants and anxiolytics (source).
Be careful though, because these physiological causes are only to be explored if you have recurring difficulties obtaining an erection. Not just an erection problem during intercourse. Otherwise, it will be a psychological origin (source).
Solutions to erection problems during sex
After having discovered the causes of an erection problem during the act, place the solutions that can remedy it.
Communicate with your partner
If the origin of your erection problem during the act is mental, the first solution remains communication. The first person you should talk to is a doctor. He can help you clarify your diagnosis.
And it is especially him who will have to prescribe you an oral treatment, if it is this solution which you wish to privilege.
You must also be able to discuss this subject with your partner. Indeed, she can also suffer from your erectile dysfunction. And imagine that she is directly the cause. Although you may be immensely frustrated by the situation and feel shame, it is essential not to avoid the topic.
Moreover, your partner can be a valuable ally to help you overcome this difficulty. Not only by reassuring you about your performance and helping you regain self-confidence.
But also by showing you how to satisfy her differently, without your penis (with your tongue, your fingers). This should relieve you of the pressure of a hard and long erection. You might also experience new sensations.
Either way, be open and honest with your partner. This is the best way to act on the main cause of your erection problem during sex: stress.
Take a break
Taking a break from having sex (especially penetrative) can be another solution. Studies have shown that avoiding penetration for at least 2 to 3 weeks can relieve stress.
Also take breaks during the act if you feel the stress starting to rise. To do this, delay penetration and focus on foreplay to give yourself time to be sufficiently calm and excited.
Multiply the foreplay
Caresses, kisses, sensual words… multiply all the stimulations that increase desire and reach a state of excitement.
Oral treatments
Certain medical treatments can be interesting for your erection problem during the act. There are many erection pills on the market, but not all are created equal.
Be careful, because they need to be sexually stimulated to act. But they allow to have an erection longer. And reduce the latency time between each of your erections. These are temporary boosts that will allow you to have several successful reports. And therefore to regain confidence in yourself.
This will not entirely reduce your stress problem. But you will still overcome your breakdowns momentarily. Beware, however, of the contraindications and risks of side effects presented by these treatments.
Change your habits
A few changes in your day-to-day life can also help you perform better in sex. Starting with your diet. Because being overweight and too high cholesterol can prevent you from maintaining your erection longer. A heart-healthy diet can also improve blood circulation throughout the body, including the penis.
Try reducing fats and sugars and adding more fruits and vegetables to your diet. Achieving a healthy weight can help improve your erectile dysfunction.
According to the Massachusetts Study of Male Aging, there is a direct link between diet and erectile difficulties. Men in the study who ate lots of fruits, vegetables and whole grains, and who avoided red meat and processed grains, were less likely to suffer from erectile difficulties (source).
Also, stop thinking of alcohol as a good aphrodisiac. Not only can it be counterproductive if you take sexual enhancers, but more importantly, alcohol can reduce your ability to get an erection.
Explanations : Alcohol affects all parts of the body responsible for a good erection. It lowers hormone levels, including testosterone, it damages your testicular and gonad cells. Even slight damage can prevent you from having or maintaining an erection.
If you smoke, try to quit. According to a study, men who smoke cigarettes have a much higher risk of suffering from erectile dysfunction. People who quit smoking are more likely to see a decrease in erectile dysfunction than those who continue to smoke (source).
Also, resume exercising if you've been inactive for too long. Start with cardio or weight training sessions for 20 to 30 minutes a day. It will help you to be more energetic and less stressed. Exercise is also a great way to lower your blood pressure and improve your circulation (source).
Bet on natural solutions
Certain foods, such as fruits and vegetables, can have surprising effects on erections. So, do not hesitate to consume aphrodisiac ginger, garlic or even beet juice, natural vasodilators which improve blood circulation, provide energy and which can prevent certain diseases which can lead to disorders of the erection.
Pomegranate is very rich in polyphenols, antioxidants and nitrates, which are powerful vasodilators. A study conducted on 19 active people showed that consuming 1000 mg of pomegranate extract 30 minutes before a workout increased blood flow, the diameter of blood vessels and exercise performance (source).
According to some studies, garlic – specifically its sulfur compounds, including allicin – can improve tissue blood flow and lower blood pressure by relaxing blood vessels.
Human and animal studies have shown that ginger reduces high blood pressure, which negatively impacts blood circulation (source).
Consult a sex therapist
If stress is the cause of your erectile problems, consulting a sex therapist is a good solution to remedy it. In addition to targeting the different factors that can lead to an increase in your anxiety, he can suggest a therapeutic plan to help you feel better from a sexual point of view.
Couples therapy is also a good idea to improve communication between you and therefore the quality of your relationship.
The consequences of an erection problem
Erectile disorders are not without consequences for men and the couple:
– A blow to the ego : if many men decide not to talk about their erectile dysfunction, these dysfunctions have negative consequences (loss of self-confidence, ego problem, etc.). If the problem is resolved quickly, men generally recover quickly. – Mood swings : if erectile dysfunction persists, the man may become irritable, close in on himself and take the slightest remark as a personal attack. For a couple, all this very often leads to a separation. – Female dissatisfaction : faced with a man unable to give her pleasure, the woman may feel frustrated. And if the problem persists, she could find solace elsewhere.